“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: a time to plant and a time to harvest. ” Ecclesiastes 3:1-2
For 35 years, I have been a farmer’s wife. I had no idea of what that title meant when I said, “I do” many years ago, but over the years, I’ve learned that being a farmer’s wife is very different than being a banker’s wife or a coach’s wife or a _________’s wife. (you can fill in the blank).
God’s word:
All wives are called to be a helpmate to their spouse. It says this truth in Genesis 2:18-22 “The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable to him.” Now the Lord God formed out of the ground all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them and whatever the man called each living creature, that was it’s name. So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field. But for Adam no suitable helper could be found. So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep slumber; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man and brought her to the man.” When Adam saw what God had made, he said, “Woah, man!” That’s why Eve was called a woman! (That last part isn’t in the Bible!) ?
These verses clearly state that we, as women, were made to be our husband’s helper. I think this especially holds true for farmers’ wives. What a calling! God knows that men need our help and our support. Many times throughout our marriage, I’ve not always been the best helper. Sometimes I would get discouraged because I often took the kids to birthday parties by myself. Or I might sit at a school play or a sporting event by myself until he could get there after working in the field all day. I would often look around at my friends with a jealous heart because their husband came home and mowed the yard and took the kids to baseball practice. My husband, on the other hand, was working from sun up to sun down to grow the crops. Elaborate vacation plans…are you kidding me? Our vacation was planned at 10:00 at night when we finally got a much needed rain and he could shut off the wells for a few days.
Being a supportive farm wife
Life on the farm is never easy, but it’s a good life. In fact, I’m so thankful for God’s blessing when He planned for my husband to be my lifetime partner. I wasn’t raised on a farm and I had no idea what I was getting into when I married into a farm family. Who would’ve ever thought that I would learn to drive a tractor (even though I ended up plowing up a few posts in the field)? I’ve also helped by picking up farm parts, following behind the tractor in the pickup when my hubby needed to move to another field and I even helped preg-check cattle. We raised our kids on the farm and they learned the value of hard work. I am thankful for the chance to watch my husband depend on our Lord to provide when we didn’t know how we were going to make it. And then to be able to give God the glory on those profitable years!
But what does it mean to be a supportive farm wife…through planting and harvest?
Be Prayful:
First of all, you must pray and pray hard! Pray daily for your husband as he comes and goes to the farm.
- Farming is a very dangerous occupation. Pray for safety for your husband and his hands.
- Pray for your husband’s attitude when times are hard and crops don’t look promising.
- Pray for his energy and stamina. Sometimes farmers work from before sun up to way after sun down. When my husband says he’ll be home at “dark-thirty”, I never know if that means 6:30 or 10:30 because he never knows either.
- Pray that his hard work will pay off and that the crops will be plentiful. I can’t imagine in my job that, at the end of the year, the superintendent would come up to me and say, “Good job, Mrs. Young. You’ve put in many, many hours and have done great work. Now, please pay us everything you made last year.” However, that’s often what farmer’s hear. They put in many, many long hours. They work as hard as anyone. But at the end of the year, sometimes they owe more to the bank than the crops produce. Yes, there are good years in farming. We are extremely grateful for those years. However, many years aren’t so plentiful. Our farmer husbands often have to stand before the banker and give them the dauting news that our crops didn’t make what they planned for. Or the weather destroyed all of the hard work. Maybe the cattle didn’t produce like what was expected. Our husbands need to know that their wives are supporting them through prayer.
Be interested:
Another way that you can show support to your farmer is to show interest in the farm. When we were dating, I loved going on the cotton stripper with my then boyfriend. He made me a little seat out of a 5 gallon bucket and a pillow on top. I would ride the stripper with him for hours with the biggest grin on my face. I would’ve never thought for one second about complaining about being on that 5 gallon bucket. I loved spending time with him no matter where we were. Fast forward 10, 20 or 35 years or so and riding the stripper doesn’t seem like so much fun. However, as I’m writing this, I’m reminded of how I need to show interest in all things related to the farm. I need to go check the crops with him and ask questions about what is going on. I need to be as excited for a new calf as I was the first time we had one. When my husband wants to talk about the latest equipment or the cotton market, I need to sit and really listen, not just pretend to listen. In fact, I might want to show some support by taking him a drink to the tractor in the afternoon and have a little smooch fest on the turn row. (Yes, that used to happen when we were younger, too.) Next time my hubby asks me to run out to the farm with him, my answer will be yes!
Be encouraging:
When farming is good, it’s good for the whole family. We might get to replace a well worn sofa, or have a little nicer Christmas. We might even get to purchase a new car. However, there are years when farmers don’t know if they will even break even.
Farming is hard right now. We have been in a drought for a couple of years and just when we thought we were ready to harvest, a sudden surge of rain came our way and is keeping the farmers out of the field. We hate to gripe about the rain, for we know our land needs the moisture and it will be a blessing in the long run. But why couldn’t it have come in June instead of October? Our farmer husbands need to know that when they come home, we will be there to encourage them. They often need us to be their biggest cheerleader, letting them know that we believe in them and will stand beside them whatever comes our way. Our husbands need a helpmate to trust their decisions and follow their dreams. Maybe your husband dreams of owning his own land one day. Or maybe he dreams of just keeping up the land that his father and his grandfather started. Maybe he dreams of newer equipment, a larger herd of cattle or a new diesel pickup. Make his dreams your dreams. He needs those dreams to keep going, so keep encouraging him.
Be supportive:
During planting and harvest, farmers spend way more hours on the tractor than with their families. There are days that you would never see your farmer if you didn’t take meals to the field. When our kids were young, we often had a picnic on the turn row. The kids thought it was the greatest thing and it gave my husband a break. The boys would take their little John Deere tractors to the farm and they would play in the dirt while Daddy got to rest for a few minutes.
Now that I’m a working woman, it is much harder to make time for those picnics in the field. However, one thing that I’ve always tried to do is provide harvest meals to my husband and his crew. They usually don’t have much time to stop for dinner so I’ve had to get creative in what I take to the field. They like to keep going while they are eating so “forkless” meals are their favorites. Listed below are 25 budget friendly meals that you can make (or pick up) that are quick and easy.
I call this first set of meals my “White Sack Meals”. During harvest time, you can look in the back of my Yukon and find white sacks, bags of chips, fruit, cookies and an ice chest full of water. At any given time, I can grab a few things and have a meal put together in no time. For every white sack meal, you can feed 4 guys or 10 guys at a moment’s notice. All you do is grab a white sack for each helper, fill it with a bottle of water, a bag of chips, a piece of fruit or cookie and the following:
- Subway sandwich ($4.99 for six-inch)
- BBQ sandwich
- Grilled bratwurst wrapped in a tortilla
- Meatball subs*
- Hot ham/cheese croissant*
- Chicken fajita with guacamole
- Roast beef sandwich
- Baked cheeseburger sliders*
- Pulled pork tortilla wraps*
- Chicken quesadillas
- Pigs in a blanket
- Sonic hamburger (1/2 price on Tuesdays)
- Classic patty melt*
- Chicken pot pie*
- Crunchwrap Supreme
Other easy fork-free meals to pick up when you don’t have time to “cook” include:
- Dairy Queen country baskets
- Little Caesar’s Hot and Ready pizzas ($5)
- Casseroles to Go offers daily meals
- Taco Bell dollar craving menu
- McDonald’s Everyday Value Menu (triple cheeseburger $3)
- KFC $5 fill ups
- Chicken express
- Burger King value menu
- Field house sandwich basket
- Allsup’s burritos (I know, I’m getting desperate here….)
Plus you can always throw in the best chocolate chip cookies. The recipe is here.
Our farmers need us ladies. God called us to be their helpmates and He has given us words of wisdom to help us in this area. Recently, our pastor has been preaching on servant-hood. We are called to serve our husbands through prayer, encouragement, support and food (after all, a way to man’s heart is through his stomach!) The call to serve is not always easy or fun. However, we should give, expecting nothing in return. Serving our husband in these ways shows him that we love him. Ask God to give you strength to serve even when you don’t want to. Remember that serving in your own strength always leads to burnout. However, when we serve in His strength, it always leads to blessings.
Be blessed,
“She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.” Proverbs 31:26
You can find other words of wisdom from Vickie at www.wisdomspot101.com.
This is your old neighbor. I am so blessed by your posts. This must have been an incredible encouraging event. Job well done!!! Soo true, so well said, so much only a good wife would understand. God Bless! 🙂 Karen Harkins
Oh Karen! Thanks for reaching out! I’m so glad to know that you were blessed! I would love to see you and Sharon!
Vickie, I know the women that heard this speech gained some great words of wisdom. This could pertain to all wives, not just farmers wives, to be supportive, encouraging, and prayerful wives, to be loving not only when life is great but when life brings disappointment, worries, etc… You do have a lot of words of wisdom, thank you for always sharing, God has given you a “gift” I’m glad you share it with all of us. Love you always, auntie
Thank you so much for posting this! As harvest season is in full swing here in South Alabama and I’m stuck at home with a three week old baby, this really speaks to me. Being a Farmer’s wife definitely isn’t an easy job! Planting and harvest seasons are trying times but there’s nothing more rewarding. Sunsets in the tractor with endless skies that meet the crops of freshly dug peanuts are amazing! I can’t wait to get back in the tractor with my farmer ♥️
I’m so glad you enjoyed this! Yes, harvest season is hard when you are home with little ones. Thankful that it doesn’t last forever.
Great read, now following!